What have I Become?! (horror)

So, some of you know that I've been on a marathon (ish) diet-exercise plan with my mom to lose about 15 pounds this summer to get a Coach purse.  And some of you know that I finally made that goal (post exercise) tonight.  Honestly, I'm expecting to gain at least .5 pound by tomorrow morning, as my weight settles down and I get rehydrated, but I don't care.  I got a Coach purse, and it is adorable.

So I got my new purse, and I'm putting things in it (duh), so I won't have to shuffle things around every time I want to go out.  Among those things are my wallet, my cell phone, and, of course, my makeup.  Not all of it, as it obviously won't fit, but some of the staples, like my eye shadow primer, a compact mirror, a small eyeshadow palette, and a lip gloss.

As I did this, I realized just how much makeup I have (compared to how much I had at the beginning of college), and then I realized how much I have splurged on makeup.

Splurging, for me, is a guilty pleasure.  I really only splurge on makeup (and occasionally Woot! T-shirts), because that's the only thing my mom doesn't really buy for me.  So makeup is the one thing I can buy without feeling too guilty because I already -have- it, but I still feel guilty for spending unnecessary money.  Right now, I'm scrambling to pay for housing, food, and textbooks, but every once in a while, I'll splurge on makeup.  Because if I'm having a shitty day, at least I'll look nice.

Of course, after these thoughts, I just realized how -girly- I've become.  Let's go way back into elementary school.  Most of my friends were male.  I played wall ball with my guy friends during recess.  Now into middle school.  I went to all the dances, yes, but instead of, well, dancing, I was outside arm-wrestling with some of my guy friends.  Even in high school, I disdained makeup.  Actually, I was more than a little prejudiced against the people who wore makeup every day, believing them to be people who only cared about appearance and being popular.  Well.  What does that make me now?

EDIT:
My more literate and eloquent friend puts it perfectly in her blog post:
Ch-Cha-Cha-Chatterbox